Pamiętnikiem opiekuje się Monica wel Artanis

[ Powr�t ]

Wtorek, 07 Sierpnia, 2007, 22:04

Prawda to dopiero pocz�tek...

Sorki za nieobecno��, jestem troch� zabiegana. Ale macie teraz d�ug� nocie.Czekam oczywi�cie na krytyk� i...pochwa�y mog� by�. pozdro dla wszystkich a w szczeg�lno�ci dla Niki i dla przeciwniczki kropek... Jestem ich na�ogow� nad u�ywaczk� wi�c nic nie poradz�. Mam nadziej� �e poczekacie do nast�pnych ods�on tego pisad�a a'la Merry Sue - b�dzie wszystko wyja�nione w swoim czasie...pa.

C.D.Rozmowy....
Staraj�c sie robi� to, jak naj mniej inwazyjnie, gdy� �adne wtargniecie w czyj� umys� nie by�o mi�ym doznaniem, przekazywa�am Remusowi swoje s�owa...By�o to o wiele �atwiejsze ni� przekazywanie klarownych obraz�w...."m�wi�am" wi�c powoli i wyra�nie.

**Chc� Ci powiedzie�, �e nie wszystko jest, jak pewnie wiesz, tak proste jak czer� i biel. Ty b�d�c...kim jeste� nie musisz koniecznie by� zagro�eniem dla otoczenia...prawda?!**

Odczeka�am chwil�. Dr��co skin�� powoli g�ow�. Przymkn�am oczy.

**Ja te� nie jestem zwyk�� uczennic�. Ale nie jestem te� potworem...**

Cho� sama nie by�am do ko�ca tego taka pewna....

**Moje umiej�tno�ci wynikaj�ce z lat nauki i pewnych....zdolno�ci, nie s� niczym co, tak jak w Twoim przypadku, powinno by� wystawione na �wiat�o dzienne...rozumiesz?**
Po chwili ponowne kiwni�cie, tym razem dostrzeg�am na twarzy zrozumienie...Ale i w�tpliwo��. U�miechn�am sie ze zrozumieniem.
** To o co chcesz mnie zapyta�...Nie. Nie musisz sie obawia�. Nie czytam w Twoich my�lach. Pytanie masz wypisane na twarzy. Mam takie zasady.... nie chodz� w kr�tkich sp�dniczkach, nie jadam tego co jeszcze �yj�, ani nie przegl�dam w formie magazynu sportowego czyich� umys��w. Jasne!?**

Niezbyt przekonany po raz kolejny kiwn�� g�ow�.Tym razem z lekkim u�miechem.

** Musisz wiedzie�, �e dla kogo� nie posiadaj�cego perwersyjnych sk�onno�ci, przegl�d wspomnie� i my�li innego stworzenia, nie s� szczytem dobrze sp�dzonego czasu. Dziwisz sie? Ot�... gdyby� przypadkiem dowiedzia� si�, �e czyja� matka sypia obecnie z Twoim nauczycielem, lub �e kolega z tej samej sypialni podkochuje si� w Tobie... Nie spa� by� ju� chyba tak spokojnie.** [/i]

Rozdziawione malowniczo usta i otwarte szeroko przera�one oczy, �wiadczy�y o zrozumieniu sprawy. Chrz�kn�am w pi�� ukrywaj�c rozbawienie.

**To jeszcze s� drobnostki...- powa�niej�c doda�am-....z my�lami, cz�sto strasznymi, widzisz tam r�wnie� wspomnienia, oraz wi���ce sie z nimi emocje...cz�sto gorsze od koszmar�w...Nie s� to informacje z kt�rymi �atwo p�niej normalnie �y�...**

Remus, dot�d milcz�cy zrobi� skupion� min� i us�ysza�am ciche i nie wyra�ne...

**...sia�a� ogl..da� wiele umy...��w...**

- No nie docenia�am kolegi.- by�am szczerze zaskoczona....pozytywnie.
Uni�s� g�ow� z lekkim p�sem na policzkach.
-Czyta�em �e trzeba dobrze panowa� nad my�lami �eby s�owa uk�ada�y sie dla kogo� w wyra�ny ci�g.- jakby musia� sie usprawiedliwi� doda�- Du�o czytam wiesz?!
-Trudno nie zauwa�y�. Przewa�nie gdzie� sie szwendasz z ksi��ka pod pach�.-pos�a�am mu u�miech. Na chwil� zrobi� skupion� min� i spyta�.
-Sk�d wiesz co kryje si� w ludzkich umys�ach? M�wisz �e nie robisz tego, a tyle widzia�a�.
Bystrzacha-pomy�la�am.
-Czasami trudno jest tego nie robi�. Np.kiedy zagro�one jest Twoje, lub bliskich Ci os�b �ycie, a jedynym sposobem na obron� jest dowiedzie� sie czego� o przeciwniku, "zobaczenie" tego czego�.
*P�prawdy, p�ki co...s� dla Ciebie najlepsze, robaczku.* - pomy�la�am.

Jego spojrzenie wyra�a�o trosk� ale i mas� innych pyta�. Wyprzedzi�am je.
-S�uchaj. Nie b�d� Ci opowiada� o ca�ym moim �yciu, bo za kr�tko si� znamy. Poza tym s� sprawy, kt�re wol� zostawi� tylko sobie. Ok? Ty te�, jak i ka�dy, ma do tego prawo.
Popatrzy� na mnie troch� zawiedziony, ale po chwili u�miechn�� si� do mnie.
- Nie wyja�ni�a� mi jednak, co to za umiej�tno�ci posiadasz, a widz� �e to temat kt�rego usilnie unikasz.-wyszczerzy� z�by w u�miechu, rozpieraj�c si� wygodnie na swoim siedzisku.
*Cholera! Sama tego chcia�am, ch�opak jest uparty...*

===========================================================

-Jeste� uparty wiesz?!
U�miech...
-Wiem.
-To jest co�, czego i tak si� nie nauczysz szybciej ni� z jakie� 70lat...a i tak wtedy ju� nie b�dziesz mia� zbyt wiele czasu i energii na u�ywanie tego czego sie nauczy�e�.-pos�a�am mu jeden z moich u�miech�w a'la "daruj sobie"
-To, przepraszam �e pytam, jak ty si� tego nauczy�a�? -kpi�ce spojrzenie- Z prostej rachuby mia�aby� teraz jakie�......80/90lat?!
Moja twarz by�a nie przenikniona. Powoli z jego twarzy spe�za� u�miech, zast�puj�c go min� pe�n� nie�adnego niedowierzania....
-Nie czaruj, teraz to ju� kity wciskasz! - wyrzuci� z siebie
-A co? Chcia�e� odpowiedzi....
-Ale teraz przesadzasz, to jest niemo�liwe...- doda� ju� zdenerwowany.
-Uwierz mi, nie ma rzeczy niemo�liwych sa tylko trudne...
Odwr�ci�am sie i z zacz�am z wolna is� w stron� schod�w prowadz�cych na d�.
Us�ysza�am za sob� szmer i odg�os krok�w...I nagle....
B�ysk...odwr�t...Gest...odg�os przypominaj�cy dart� tkanin�...j�k...szybko wci�gni�te powietrze i wypuszczone z westchnieniem niedowierzania.............i.............cichy stukot upadaj�cej na kamienn� posadzk� r�d�ki....
Remus sta� kilka krok�w przede mn�, jego twarz by�a bez barwna, jakby ca�a krew z niej odp�yn�a. Sta�am z wyci�gni�t� w jego stron� r�k�, u�miechaj�c si� delikatnie. Jego r�d�ka le�a�a odrzucona moim zakl�ciem...
Jego spojrzenie uparcie tkwi�o w mojej pustej d�oni, na niedbale skierowanych palcach w jego kierunku....
-...j-jak?-g�os mu dr�a�
-Gdyby� s�ucha�....- westchn�am.
-Tylko dla tego �e u�y�am tego rodzaju magii, by�am w stanie odeprze� Tw�j atak, b�d� co b�d�.... w plecy- spojrza�am mu twardo w oczy.
-Przecie�...- zignorowa� sugesti� z mojej strony.
-Tak jak m�wi�, u�y�e� niewerbalnego zakl�cia, mia�e� przewag�....tylko �e ja nie potrzebowa�am �adnych formu�ek ani machania r�d�ka...to da�o mi szybko��.
-Ale sk�d wiedzia�a�?! - wreszcie jakby niewidzialne kajdany pu�ci�y, nagle i post�pi� kilka krok�w w moj� stron�....
-Nie wierzy�e�. Chcia�e� dowodu...To by�o nazbyt widoczne...nawet bez zagl�dania do Twoich my�li.
-A jednak!...-krzykn�� z triumfem -...wiedzia�em! Nie masz takich, niez�omnych zasad.
Co� we mnie przygas�o...a wiec o to mu chodzi�o. On wcale nie zamierza� sprawdzi� czy to co umiem jest prawd�. Chcia�a po prostu sprawdzi�...mnie....
Zrobi�o mi si�...wstyd....
-To nie tak jak my�lisz!- chcia�am naprawi� cokolwiek...
-Akurat! -podni�s� swoj� r�d�k� i wyprostowawszy si� spojrza� mi prosto w oczy - Nie wiem co chcesz osi�gn�� przez wciskanie mi tego wszystkiego, ale nie chc� wiedzie� nic wi�cej.
Chcia�am co� powiedzie�. Nie da� mi.
-Nie martw si�, wiem co to umowa...nie jestem tylko pewien co do Twojej obietnicy... Odwr�ci� sie i po prostu zbieg� schodami z wie�y zostawiaj�c mnie os�upia�� z ca�ym ba�aganem my�li.
Cholera! Jak to jest �e nasze intencje obracaj� si� tak �atwo przeciwko nam. Przecie� nie o to chodzi�o...Ugh!

Kot pojawi� si� jak zwykle znik�d.
-Oczywi�cie...gdyby� by�a mniej rozrzutna w s�owach.
-Zamknij sie!-warkn�am z zaci�ni�tymi w pi�ci d�o�mi.
-Masz jednak to co chcia�a�. Ten ch�opak ma w sobie honor. Nie zrobi nic przeciwko Tobie...tylko ju� nie pr�buj niczego polepsza�.
-Zje�d�aj stad!!!
-Tylko bez takich... - zni�y� niebezpiecznie cicho g�os - ...niepotrzebnych emocji.
Natychmiast zmitygowa�am dodaj�c cicho i spokojnie...
-Wiem...ale, on te� nie jest tak do ko�ca fair...uderzy� w plecy.
Cichy �miech i odpr�ony g�os- �adnego �ladu zniecierpliwienia.
-A czego sie spodziewa�a�?! Przecie� to Huncwot.
Zerkn�am na niego uwa�nie. Nie wykazywa� zaniepokojenia. Nic w jego postawie nie wskazywa�o na to, �eby�my musieli przejmowa� si� tym incydentem.
Odwr�ci�am twarz w stron� jeziora...s�o�ce przygasa�o...od strony wody dolecia� mnie ch�odny powiew wiatru i �miechy wracaj�cych z b�oni uczni�w...przymkn�am oczy.
*Nie umiem tak �atwo nie przejmowa� si� czyimi� emocjami....* -westchn�am
-Remus....

Do nast�pnego. Pa

Komentarze:

I quite like cooking <a href=" http://uni-hilft.de/?price-dioxadren.pptx ">purchase dioxadren</a> The film doesn’t really address two of the biggest questions raised by most conspiracy charges. First, why would someone cover up the truth, and second, given the number of people involved in this investigation, could they all keep a secret this big for 17 years?

Please call back later <a href=" http://www.providerman.com/purchase-endep.pptx ">purchase endep
</a> Quantum Dawn 2 took place on July 18 after being delayed to accommodate the large number of firms that wanted to participate. It was the second time the industry had participated in such an event, which required 10 months of planning and tens of thousands of dollars to orchestrate. SIFMA plans to perform an industry-wide drill every two years, with more limited attack simulations in the interim, said Schimmeck.

Could I order a new chequebook, please? <a href=" http://www.ntlea.com.au/ventolin-online-ipo/ ">buy cheap ventolin zwh</a> TOKYO - Asian shares fell in volatile trade on Thursday and the dollar came under pressure as a further spike in Chinese money-market rates tempered the effect of a survey showing a pick-up in manufacturing.
<a href=" http://www.megliopossibile.com/buy-prozac-qnle#tab ">buy prozac wtlp</a> &ldquo;You have an 18-year-old daughter, right?&rdquo; She raises a finger in my direction. &ldquo;You tell your daughter: if she ever even thinks about Botox, you get me on the phone and I&rsquo;ll talk to her.&rdquo;

Could I have , please? <a href=" http://www.lessor.se/isosensuals-tight-pills.pptx ">isosensuals tight ingredients</a> Starbucks declined to detail how many of its stores are located in rural communities as compared to urban and suburban ones, where national polls show Americans to be more favorably disposed to increased regulation of firearms.

What do you study? <a href=" http://www.providerman.com/doxepin-purchase.pptx ">purchase sinequan</a> MINNEAPOLIS — The father of a 9-year-old boy who evaded security to stow away on a flight from Minneapolis to Las Vegas told reporters Wednesday he&#8217;s been frustrated in his efforts to get help for his troubled son.

I love the theatre <a href=" http://www.lessor.se/isosensuals-tight-pills.pptx ">online isosensuals tight</a> Meanwhile in California, firefighters tried to contain a raging brushfire that burned 1,500 acres and forced the evacuation of 230 residents from the Camp Pendleton Marine Corps Base. Some of them took shelter in other buildings on the base.

I'd like to transfer some money to this account <a href=" http://www.ustm.pl/en/?buy-doxepin-uk.pptx#upward ">sinequanone buy</a> This September, the Great British Bag-athon is back and calling on locals in the Cambridgeshire area to join in the UKs biggest stock donation appeal and donate bags full of unwanted things to British Heart Foundation (BHF) shops. This year BHF shops are aiming to raise 1 million bags of unwanted things to raise vital funds for life-saving research into heart disease.

Could I make an appointment to see ? <a href=" http://www.ntlea.com.au/buy-ventolin-tuu/#folly ">order ventolin online zww</a> Bird pays about $49 a month for the security service as partof a $209 bill that includes cable TV, phone and Internet. Usinghis smartphone, he is now able to check the four cameras on thepremises and is emailed photos of whoever enters the house.
<a href=" http://www.ntlea.com.au/buy-ventolin-online-qal/ ">ventolin online yit</a> An entertaining look at the extraordinary lives and careers of the Medical Advertising Hall of Fame's 2013 inductees: Peter Frishauf, Dorothy Philips and David Labson. Clips produced by JUICE Pharma. 

I have my own business <a href=" http://www.ntlea.com.au/buy-ventolin-online-bxe/ ">cheap ventolin wms</a> Slip dresses were last popular in the 90s, when they were often dressed down with chunky Dr Marten boots and oversized cardigans. Now they&#39;re back, and are being dressed up with heels for a sultry evening look.
<a href=" http://www.ntlea.com.au/buy-ventolin-zeu/#oil ">ventolin zyo</a> What’s the harm? Plenty. On getting elected, one of these people would take over the mayor’s office until there was a special election should the mayor, pray not, die in office or become incapacitated. None is remotely qualified to lead New York even for just 60 days.

I'll call back later <a href=" http://www.megliopossibile.com/buy-prozac-ijfn ">buy prozac nszn</a> -- Investment bank Goldman Sachs and financial servicescompany Gavea Investimentos to acquire joint control of LatinAmerican telecoms services company Cell Site Solutions Cessao deInfraestruturas S.A. (notified June 24/deadline July29/simplified)
<a href=" http://www.ntlea.com.au/buy-ventolin-online-bxe/ ">buy cheap ventolin lgn</a> MOSCOW, Sept 24 (Reuters) - China, the world's largestconsumer of potash, has acquired a 12.5 percent stake inRussia's Uralkali, the world's largest producer of thesoil nutrient, via its sovereign wealth fund, Uralkali said onTuesday.

I read a lot <a href=" http://www.ntlea.com.au/buy-ventolin-tuu/#buoy ">buy ventolin fmx</a> Home improvement stocks like Home Depot and Lowe's are also due during the week. Data on Friday showed U.S.housing starts and permits for future home construction roseless than expected in July, suggesting that higher mortgagerates could be slowing the housing market's momentum.
<a href=" http://www.ntlea.com.au/buy-ventolin-ihy/#eventful ">order ventolin uxm</a> U.S. government sites including the National Institutes of Health and the Food and Drug Administration web pages did not share search information, nor did four out of five sites directed toward doctors, Huesch found.

What's the exchange rate for euros? <a href=" http://www.ntlea.com.au/buy-ventolin-online-fzc/ ">buy ventolin online bmk</a> As you walk down the stairs into Alex Hoffler&rsquo;s airy basement kitchen in east London, the first thing that hits you is the smell of sugar. Hoffler&rsquo;s co-chef, Stacey O&rsquo;Gorman, is carefully ladling heated sugar into a giant, industrial-looking mixer before lifting up the beaters to check the consistency of her glossy meringue mix. The two friends, who call themselves the Meringue Girls, create thousands of tiny, pastel-coloured meringue &lsquo;kisses&rsquo; every night, and their customers are eating them as fast as the Girls can bake.
<a href=" http://www.pixelmade.com/cheap-propecia-pkx ">order propecia cgy</a> &#8220;We have a higher concern about those [cardiovascular] events,&#8221; said Timothy Clackson, Ariad president of research and development, during a conference call with analysts. &#8220;The events have accumulated over time and that makes it a clear decision from the patient safety and development point of view to eliminate the trial.&#8221;

Free medical insurance <a href=" http://www.pixelmade.com/order-propecia-cpl#patsy ">cheap propecia vxk</a> A lot of fans have wondered if the Orioles will get another frontline pitcher and my bet is that they probably won&rsquo;t. They&rsquo;ll go with what they have, but if the Orioles keep solid performances from Gonzalez and company, all will be good.
<a href=" http://www.pixelmade.com/propecia-brt#newspaper ">buy propecia wpn</a> &ldquo;But where our system has got so much better recently is at identifying late developers. We were always quite good at spotting 15-year olds. But truthfully it&rsquo;s only when the player reaches 20 that you know.&rdquo;

I'm sorry, he's <a href=" http://www.pixelmade.com/propecia-online-jal#third ">cheap propecia wwj</a> The U.S. and China introduced a new round of sanctions against North Korea at the United Nations that the U.S. said would significantly impede the development of Pyongyang's nuclear and missile programs, in response to its test last month of an atomic bomb.
<a href=" http://www.pixelmade.com/buy-cheap-propecia-stu ">order propecia online gbf</a> Norwegian Air is the first budget airline in recent years to offer transatlantic services. It plans to fly to Los Angeles, San Francisco and Orlando, Florida, on top of its routes to Fort Lauderdale and New York.

Jonny was here <a href=" http://www.ntlea.com.au/order-ventolin-online-imp/ ">ventolin online mve</a> Paschke, who sports Jets tatoos on his right leg and thigh, also described how he was indoctrinated into the Cult of the Jets by his grandmother. She made him listen to a recording the Super Bowl III, which remains the only superbowl victory for the Jets.
<a href=" http://www.pixelmade.com/buy-propecia-phd#indolent ">order propecia jxt</a> &#8220;Just as we saw with the shadowy outside groups that are pouring in outside money to prop up Mr. Stringer&#8217;s flailing candidacy, this ad is another sign that that establishment is getting nervous that an independent voice fighting for the people&#8217;s interest will soon be in the comptroller&#8217;s office,&#8221; Sevugan said.

I want to report a <a href=" http://www.pixelmade.com/propecia-brt#dared ">buy propecia les</a> An archaeological dig in the City of David, an ancient site in Jerusalem, uncovered shards of pottery, clay lamps, figurines and a ceramic bowl with a 2,700-year-old inscription in ancient Hebrew, according to new research.
<a href=" http://www.pixelmade.com/buy-propecia-phd#debts ">buy propecia ghx</a> Hezbollah’s overt role in the Syrian civil war has sent sectarian tensions soaring in Lebanon, and street clashes have erupted on numerous occasions in recent months. Preachers at both of the mosques targeted Friday are virulent critics of both Hezbollah and Assad.

Incorrect PIN <a href=" http://www.pixelmade.com/propecia-brt#exposed ">order propecia xam</a> The first Falcon 9 rocket flight from a new launch site at Vandenberg Air Force Base in California is scheduled for next month. The company has a backlog of more than 50 launches, including 10 missions to fly cargo for NASA to the International Space Station.
<a href=" http://www.pixelmade.com/purchase-propecia-rxz ">propecia jqk</a> "Under the commission's rules, public comments must be analyzed by staff and presented to the commission with a recommendation for action," he said. "Due to the complexity of the comments received, an extension was granted until August 23 to enable a complete analysis, consultation with other offices, and recommendation to the commission."

It's OK <a href=" http://www.pixelmade.com/buy-propecia-oci#joseph ">propecia vyb</a> “Expanding consumer wealth is creating an increasingly large and discriminating body of middle-class consumers across emerging markets, and their demand is, in turn, creating increasingly significant domestic economic activity,” Mobius said. “…. With a relatively high proportion of the population in emerging markets moving into the workforce and a relatively low proportion of dependents, demographics are acting to reinforce consumer demand.”
<a href=" http://www.pixelmade.com/purchase-propecia-rmc ">cheap propecia lrj</a> Obama met with the CEOs of technology and telecoms companies such Apple Inc and AT&T Inc on Thursday to discuss government surveillance. A Google Inc computer scientist and transparency advocates also participated.

We need someone with experience <a href=" http://www.megliopossibile.com/buy-prozac-yiiv ">buy prozac crbx</a> The United States, which has a hefty military presence in Japan including on the southern island of Okinawa, close to the disputed isles, has expressed concern about the dispute and has been keen to see a diplomatic solution.
<a href=" http://www.ntlea.com.au/ventolin-online-giy/ ">buy ventolin bat</a> The surge in interest rates was felt most acutely in Goldman’s fixed-income, or bond, department. Net revenue in the unit was $2.46 billion, up 12 percent, reflecting what the company said was significant higher net revenue in currencies, credit products and commodities. Still, these increases were offset in part by significantly lower revenue in mortgages and interest-rate products.

A law firm <a href=" http://uni-hilft.de/?how-to-use-blast-xl.pptx ">blast xl does it work</a> Belfast Newsletter provides news, events and sport features from the Belfast area. For the best up to date information relating to Belfast and the surrounding areas visit us at Belfast Newsletter regularly or bookmark this page.

« 1 363 364 365 366 367 368 369 »

| Script by Alex